It’s been a while
This is a self-reflective update for myself and a bit of my story.
It really has been more than a couple of months since the last time I was able to sit down and create or work on something.
What’s stopping me? Work has been taking more than a fair share of my life, I’d say.
What has work been like:
Here are the facts and you can judge for yourself:
Work is Finance IT L2 handling backend maintenance, system checks/updates, batches for about 30+ apps, and application support.
I work about 9-10 hours a day (often no lunch break)
20-60 hour overtime a month (went down a bit since I complained in October)
On rotation to work on weekends
Need to pick up work phone whenever even in the middle of the night; this is not paid.
My salary is about 310,000 yen a month including everything
Overtime is not paid
If I need to commute to the office, on an average day I have about 24 - 10 (work) - 3 (commute) - 7 (sleep) = 4 hours for myself.
This may be a bit of a rant… I consider myself a responsible person. Since I’ve had this job for almost 2 years now, I think I committed more than what I was paid to do. But perhaps I have performed at my job too well. I was given more responsibilities than my peers without additional compensation. I know it’s a normal thing almost anywhere we go, but realizing how big of a difference it was, I was really thrown off balance mentally.
I have been stressed and braindead most of the time, especially lately, as somehow I became responsible to train two new people. I think the fact that I dream about work is saying something…
…
I strive for growth and creativity. And I need to make changes for the better.
So what I want to do is dial myself back at work. I will do what’s needed but will not commit more than I need to. I don’t see room for growth or even fair compensation in the near future. I need to find myself more time and energy outside of work, even just the mind space.
I am also considering finding a different job - either more time for myself or a better salary.
Short term goal is better management of effort and energy, and being on the lookout for opportunities. I can do this!
